Part 3 of 19 in Trust Yourself: A Guide for Indian Parents← Part 2Part 4 →
I’ve been thinking a lot about sentences lately. Not the kind we scribble on prescription pads or the ones we see in pitch decks. Rather, the sentences that define our beliefs, shape our actions, and, ultimately, determine our outcomes. I find myself returning to one particular sentence that has guided me through the many twists and turns of my career: “You are the expert on this child.”
Now, you might wonder why an IVF specialist and angel investor would place so much weight on a sentence about parenting. But in my view, this idea transcends its literal meaning. It speaks to the heart of what it means to take responsibility for something precious, whether it’s a child, a startup, or even one’s own health.
In the world of fertility and IVF, I often remind my patients that they are the true experts on their own bodies. Doctors, myself included, can offer advice, outline options, and share statistics, but we can’t feel what you feel. We don’t live in your skin. This idea of personal expertise is just as relevant when I’m speaking with a founder who is passionately pitching their startup. They know their product, their vision, and their market better than anyone else. My role is to listen, to probe, and to support—not to dictate.
Yet, this is where a common misconception creeps in. The prevalent belief is that experts—doctors, investors, educators—are the ones with the definitive answers. This couldn’t be further from the truth. Expertise is not about having all the answers; it’s about knowing which questions to ask and having the humility to acknowledge when you don’t know.
Let’s dismantle this myth that external experts hold all the keys. In reality, the most transformative insights often come from within. In my practice, I’ve seen patients whose instincts led them to seek second opinions, resulting in successful treatments that might have been overlooked otherwise. Similarly, I’ve witnessed founders who trusted their gut and pivoted their business models, ultimately leading to success that defied conventional wisdom.
So, what does it mean to embrace your own expertise? For parents, it means trusting your observations about your child, even when they contradict what a teacher might say. For patients, it means being an active participant in your health journey, asking questions, and seeking clarity. For founders, it means having the courage to follow your vision, even when it goes against the grain.
This brings us to the practical steps you can take to harness this personal expertise:
1. Daily Observation: Start by observing what happens around you with a fresh pair of eyes. Whether it’s watching your child’s interactions, noting your body’s signals, or analyzing your business metrics, daily contact provides better data than any external report.
2. Watch, Try, Adjust: This is the iterative process that leads to breakthroughs. Don’t be afraid to experiment and make mistakes. In both parenting and entrepreneurship, it’s about watching what happens, trying new approaches, and adjusting based on feedback.
3. Hands-On Learning: Knowledge is best acquired through experience. Whether it’s learning about a new fertility treatment or a business strategy, engage directly and don’t hand over the reins too quickly.
4. Challenge Assumptions: Just because a so-called expert says something doesn’t make it gospel. When a teacher is wrong about your child, speak up. When an investor doubts your strategy, provide evidence.
5. Value Free Time: Free time isn’t wasted time. It’s when your mind is free to explore new ideas, and when your child or your startup can develop organically.
6. Respect, Not Cramming: In education, as in life, respect the individual’s pace. Cramming leads to short-term gains but misses the deeper understanding.
7. Balance Screen Time: Screens are someone else’s timetable. Find the balance that works for you, your family, and your business.
8. Trust Your Instincts: Agency is not indulgence. Trust your instincts, and don’t be afraid to take the reins.
The journey of embracing one’s own expertise is not without its challenges. It requires confidence and resilience. But the rewards are immense, not just in terms of outcomes, but in the satisfaction of knowing you are in control of your own destiny.
In closing, I’d like to share a personal conviction: The sentence “You are the expert on this child” is not just about children. It’s a reminder that we are the experts on our own lives. By embracing this belief, we empower ourselves to make informed, thoughtful decisions in every aspect of our lives. Whether it’s in the clinic, the boardroom, or the classroom, the sentence still matters. And always will.